Beauties, have you ever heard about attachment issues? Quoted from MasterClass, attachment issues are a mental health condition where a person experiences difficulty in forming healthy relationships and emotional bonds with other people. This is influenced by the parenting pattern that a person receives since childhood.
One type of attachment issue is anxious attachment. Someone who has an anxious attachment style finds it difficult to feel secure in their relationships. They feel anxious and afraid that they will be abandoned, resulting in distrust and low self-esteem.
So, how can someone get rid of anxious attachment issues? Come on, let’s look at the following 5 ways.
1. Mengenali Tanda Anxious Attachment Issue
Ilustrasi Anxious Attachment Issue/ Foto: Pexels/Alex Green
If Beauties have anxious attachment issues, it is important to know the characteristics and triggers that cause this to happen. Some of the symptoms you may experience are:
Emotional discomfort when alone. Codependent with others. Have low self-esteem, insecurity, and worry about yourself. Needs validation from others. Feeling unworthy of other people’s love. A sense of distrust arises towards other people. It’s hard to say no to people.
Once you recognize the signs of anxious attachment, you can change negative thoughts into safe positive thoughts (secure attachment).
2. Learn to improve your character with people who have secure attachment
Illustration of a Couple Having a Secure Attachment/ Photo: Pexels/J Carter
It is important for a person to have emotional closeness, calm, and stability in a relationship. Therefore, someone who has an anxious attachment can learn this through forming relationships with other people who have a secure attachment or secure attachment style. A person with anxious attachment issues can learn the following traits from a secure attachment:
Understand that a person may not be able to change past experiences, but they can change current experiences. Understand that it is important to voice emotional needs and desires, even if you are afraid of disappointing others. Set boundaries with others and learn to say “no.” 3. Build Self-Esteem by Fighting Negative Thoughts
Illustration of a Couple Having a Healthy Relationship/ Photo: Pexels/Sleepi Alleyne
Someone with anxious attachment has a variety of negative thoughts related to their low self-esteem, such as being too worried that their partner will leave them, being afraid of not being able to contact their partner all the time, having a deep fear of rejection, and needing constant reassurance that they are good enough, attractive enough, or worthy overall.
To eliminate these negative thoughts, you can be open about your emotional needs and accept that your partner may not be able to meet these needs. Think positive things about yourself and try to meet your emotional needs independently, without depending on other people.
4. Control your emotions and reactions with the Mindfulness Method
Illustration of a Woman Practicing Mindfulness/ Photo: Pexels/Andrea Piacquadio
Mindfulness teaches us to live and be aware of the current moment, and pay attention to what is happening in that moment by being aware of and controlling potential triggers for our fears. Through this method, we are better able to control our emotions and actions in response to them, learn to calm ourselves, resist emotional outbursts and large reactions in various situations, and handle conflicts without negative emotions.
5. Make an appointment with a professional to do psychotherapy
Illustration of a Woman in Mind Therapy with Professionals/ Photo: Pexels/MART PRODUCTION
Professional psychotherapy can be an important option if you find it difficult to control your anxious attachment and it has an impact on your social relationships. This method will help you to understand past problems that influenced you to produce anxious attachment. Psychotherapy may include:
Cognitive behavioral therapy: focuses on how thoughts can influence beliefs, attitudes, and behavior. Interpersonal therapy: focuses on emotional regulation.
Well, those are the Beauties ways to get rid of anxious attachment issues. As an alternative, you can also keep an emotion journal and note patterns when you feel anxious due to certain triggers.
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